Lots to say. I better say it now or the pregnancy might end and motherhood might begin. When I think about it, motherhood has already begun, hasn’t it? I am already nurturing a tiny little person inside me.
I had a scan in the fag end of my eight month and the scan said that my due date may be advanced from April 16th to April 5th. I was so excited. I know babies are a lot of work and my life will change in a way that can never be reversed, yet I was eager to meet this tiny little person inside me. I saw baby’s little feet, perfect and beautiful, on the scan. My MIL got to see a lot more, I was lying down, while the radiologist was explaining to MIL as to what on the screen was what.
I now visit the doc every ten days. I wish I lived in the doc’s house and the doc told me every moment that the baby is doing good. I have been told to monitor baby movements. I don’t know if I am doing it right, or if the baby is really not moving. As I have progressed through pregnancy, I have worried less and less. Yet a tiny worry will creep in once in a while. May be it is all a parcel of motherhood.
I am putting on weight rapidly. It is very hard for me to judge how much my stomach is expanding, but I am showing pretty lots. I was told in office today that my stomach was huge.
That brings me to another topic, I am still working. If I had a car, I would actually work till the day before delivery. I need all the holidays for later on when the baby is actually there. As of now, but for the mild physical discomfort, I am pretty much OK. I still travel by public transport, our very own PTC buses. But I only board a bus where there is a seat for me and if it is a direct bus, much better. My trip back from office is by a van.
The doctor actually told me to start the maternity leave from the 20th and my FIL bet that I would go on my leave from that day, as I already huff and puff and sigh when I have to get up and walk, as in get up from being seated on the floor.
I learnt these pregnancy exercises sometime back, and I do them at least once a day. I try to pull in 30 minutes of walking too, but somedays, I would rather laze around.
March 9th , I came to my mom’s house. I so looked forward to eating sweets made by mom. But Murphy comes into the picture and my sugar level is a little high. And me being me, can get pretty paranoid, so am staying away from sugar and sweets. Atleast, I will get to have them once baby is there.
My BP is high too at 144. I have reached a point where these figures just annoy me. I wish it didn’t have to and I didn’t have to worry. But anyways, people tell me that towards the fag end of pregnancy, BP does rise, so am OK and not exactly paranoid.
There still is no name for the baby. Husband and myself call the baby, Pappu. But it certainly doesn’t qualify for an official name. I should be looking for a name but honestly, am lazy. My kid is going to grow and read this post and get real mad at me, if I (along with the in-laws and husband) do end up giving a funny name to my kid. I don’t know if it is a boy or a girl. Half of me wishes I knew and the other half likes the suspense.
Now what baby do I really want? When I think real deep and answer honestly, I don’t know. I just want a healthy normal baby.
At the last visit to the doc, I asked her when would the baby possibly be born and she told me that I should really not think about it and the baby will come when it wants to. When I heard that from her, I thought to myself, “easier said than done”. But it does make sense. I was reading this book called “Dr.Spock’s pregnancy guide” and the details towards the last few chapters about labour and delivery were actually scaring me. I have to face it, but why worry about it now itself. So what the doc says makes sense. I am not going to think about delivery now. I am going to go about my life normally (the huge tummy not withstanding). The baby will come when it wants to and God will give me the strength and do the best for me.
The months have really gone fast and I cant believe that the pregnancy could be over anytime now. It might take longer too. I wish I have the patience to wait for my baby. I know that each day near the due date can bring a lot of anxiety. I just wish I have the will and patience to live through that. A lot of women have told me that not getting tensed during labour will help in a normal delivery. I wish I don’t have a C-section. That’s just a wish, the ultimate goal is a healthy baby and hopefully a healthy me too, so I can take real good care of the baby.
My company gives 3 months maternity leave and I can take one additional month off, which sums up to 4 months. That’s how long I plan to take off now. I will miss office, as much as I plain feel lazy to come to work. I have this very comp with me since I started work. This comp has been with me though thick and thin. I hope they don’t allocate my system to anyone else. I have cleared my personal data and am also in the process of clearing up my mobile drawer too. Am all set for the journey when it chooses to begin. I may not have it all figured out, but am willing to take this adventure ride and am actually looking forward to it.
I hope to keep blogging. My mom’s house doesn’t have a comp but I will try to put in my thoughts here. Wish me luck everyone!!!